13 days already? Lessons 2024 has taught me
It’s just 13 days into the year, and I already feel like a sage ready to dish our wise words from my “drum" of wisdom. (There is a reason why it’s a drum and not the fountain, but just ignore that, pretend like you never saw it😂. If you did not even get it, just forget it, you get.)
This will most likely be a very chaotic piece, but let’s get right to it.
For my first lesson, I’ll be relating a story about something that happened about five days ago(on Monday). I had an exam two days ago(on Thursday), and I still had a loads to revise that fateful Monday. I was already frustrated by the fact that there was no light anywhere on campus that night, frustrated by the fact that I had to get water that I’d use the following morning, and that I still had to eat something, while still reading something that night. It was a couple of minutes past 9pm when I decided to start with these activities, so you can imagine how tired I was.
I fetched water, and proceeded to do the second thing on my list: take the things I needed to feed myself. Tell me why I could not find my wardrobe’s key in my school bag. I searched through every corner of the bag, checked my other bags, checked under my bed, and rechecked my school bag about three more times. I sat down in frustration for a couple of minutes, thought of all possible alternatives and reasons why I couldn’t find my keys: Did I lose them while taking stuff from my bag? Will I have to break the wardrobe to get my things? Is that even possible this late?
After weighing my options and blaming myself for misplacing my keys, I chose to forget anything called being a big girl for the night, snapped my padlock, and decided to go knocking from one door to the other in my block.
It was 10:26pm when I took a picture of my padlock
Imagine someone coming to your room that late to beg for a key that matches to just open her wardrobe. Anyways, I did that for just two rooms before getting something that looked like my keys. Alas! It worked? No, it didn’t. At this point, I was genuinely tired from the bottom of my heart. I decided to check my bag one last time for some reason, and guess who found her keys in one corner of the bag: Meee. That second, I knew what relief washing over someone meant.
In those difficult minutes of the day, a realization came upon me: The little things we take for granted come back to bite us when they are not available to be taken for granted.
For example, having constant supply of electricity is something someone exposed to it will probably not take note of, until there is no light for days. We need light, we use the light, we always get to use light when we want to know, we tend to leave our phones to the last battery percentage before charging because we never think of the fact that one day, it may just never be there. And so when it is no longer there, or it stops being there for sometime, we understand its importance.
What about our phone’s cord that we never really pay attention to? When it starts to malfunction, getting our phone charged by just one bar becomes a big deal. Then, we really get to see that we never really saw the value of these seemingly trivial things.
On the following day, four days ago, another realization came to me: sometimes, we tend to take the relationships in our lives for granted and appreciate such relationships less than we should because we have known the other for so long, and because we are used to getting whatever it is we get from such relationships so easily, be it friendships or family relationships. I also saw a movie today that highlights that truth a bit further. We need something, they provide it. We want to talk, they are there. We need them, they are present. Our friendships and ties become so familiar that we unconsciously do things by routine.
What happens when they are no longer there?
What happens when they leave, not necessarily because of death or something bad, but a change in circumstance that makes them not present anymore, or as much as we are used to?
What happens when they have to move, when we have to move, when work becomes hectic for either of us?
What happens when my roommate is no longer there? When I have said my farewell? What happens when you can no longer ask him, ask her to wake you up to read? What happens when you can no longer hear the sound of water pour from a bucket to another by 5am because the person that always poured is no longer there? What happens when I can no longer hear you can no longer take in the aroma of my friend’s food because there is no friend making delicious food?
What happens when your sister leaves her favourite bowl of water with you as a gift? What happens when this gift constantly reminds you of moments in your relationship with her? What happens when my friend’s mirror is no longer there by the wall of our shared room? When I pass the wall to check myself and all that is staring back at me is nothing, but a strongly made opaque wall? When I have to hiss in anger because of another reminder that my friend is no longer with me? What happens when a memory makes you smile and miss the recipient of that relationship you just started to consciously appreciate?
This takes me to my third lesson and realization these past days: Live, laugh and love. This isn’t any aspire to maguire thing, it is just something I am learning to do. There are three components to my third lesson, and you have probably previously heard those words, but living, laughing heartily and loving people, especially those that mean a lot to you is a way to make the problems of life less weighty on our minds. I am still learning to do this, I am learning to do more of them everyday, and I think you should do the same too.
Asides the fact that you beam, glow naturally and are happier when you do these things, it becomes obvious to people around you. People notice these things, they do. However, that’s not the main point. You can pick one component and work on it for the mean time. When you do, you can tell me what came out of it.
There was something a lot of people said when the year started: show your work. I am not going to tell you why you should do that, because I am just learning to do that. I am learning to do that because I love love love to write, it is my happy place; and I am particularly excited because I saw the result of showing and telling people what I do exactly seven days ago. I was asked to introduce myself in a meeting, and I confidently told people in a meeting of ten individuals that I write. This is not something I do, what I do is tell people individually, not often in a group. I know it’s just ten persons, but it was a great deal to me, and I was very proud of myself.
Also, the ground did not swallow me. I’m still here, writing to you😂. I think I got a number of persons saying that they never knew that I write. That told me something that now rings in my mind: unapologetically show your work.
You can guess how I feel now and what I have resolved to do: tell more people that I write, share my works, and talk about them as much as I can
When I started writing this spontaneously tonight, I wasn’t going to include this, but I complimented someone tonight, and her bright smile and appreciation made me proud of myself. I asked someone I am familiar with a question about something I noticed about her, and she was really grateful that I noticed and asked what I asked.
Bonus lessons😂: genuinely and respectfully compliment someone today, be observant as to what is going on with people you are close to. This will, in addition to making the other happy, make you happy.
As always, clap👏👏as many as 50 times. I’d really love to know your thoughts and how you feel about the lessons I shared.
I will see you when I see you. Sorry, I will write to you when I do. Ciao, people.
